Hi. It’s me, Kath. I’m back. Again.

As you may have heard, my mom died back in April.

That was followed by a long summer. An adjustment period. And my sister’s wedding!

Two of these bridesmaids are pregnant, but it's not me (I'm 2nd from left). So what's MY excuse?

But now it’s September. The wedding festivities are over, the kids are back at school, and we have a routine again.

Time to get back on my head.

My Weight Watchers leader had a great meeting last week; nearly every word she said pierced my heart. I confessed to her afterward that I’m TERRIBLE with tracking, and she told me she wanted to see my tracker next week.

That was all it took. Well, maybe not ALL, but it was a great start. I vowed to start small. I’d eat whatever I wanted, but track everything.

But I found that just the act of writing it down made me think twice. Later that same day, I reached for a leftover pastry. I had the fleeting thought, “Nobody cares if I eat this.” Then I remembered my tracker. And my leader’s face. And felt disappointed in myself. And I walked away from the pastry.

I tracked every day. Probably not perfectly. Right through dinner with my sister and her bridesmaids, through the pizza at the rehearsal dinner and the wedding cake and chocolate fountain at the reception. (Even through my dad offering to take my half-eaten dinner plate from me at the reception…his idea of portion control, I guess.)

And yesterday, I lost at my Weight Watchers meeting: 1.6 lbs.

I’ve also been back to the gym: twice in two days. I’m starting small…just 15 minutes on the elliptical and a bit of lifting. But I feel successful already.

“Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.”
-Psalm 51:10